10 Things I’ve Learnt About Motherhood (so far)

• For the past 4 and half months, I’ve learnt that being a dictator, even to an infant is futile. Democracy works: make them believe that they want it and give it to them anyway. They might protest in the beginning but eventually they’ll find their way to accepting.

• You have to exercise loving patience if you want them to do anything… coerce gently with some sweet kisses and a lot of love. Consider it DONE!

• And if it’s not done, rely on your persistence. Stop, take a deep breathe and start again on a new day. A new page. You’ll be surprised how easily forgotten yesterday’s episode is. We soldier on, with the love and patience.

• They (especially the males) have to believe they are in charge – they start very young. That it was THEIR idea. That it will do them some good. Negotiate.

• NEVER make it seem like a battle. You will NOT win. Their rebellion and shattering cry will only stress/ frustrate/ humiliate you more. Charm them with a hug/ kiss during and/or after. Tell them you love them and give them a breast (the one they love the most) or their favourite meal.

• Learn to delay or deny them satisfaction (attention/ breast etc), sometimes. This way they learn to appreciate it more when they get it. They also learn that they can’t ALWAYS get what they want.

• Surrender to smelling like breastmilk (leaking from your breast or leaking from his mouth), at least for the first 3 months. After that, he can learn to start associating you with Coco Chanel Mademoiselle ☺

• For the first 3 months surrender to looking like you just woke up – the whole time. The item he loves most on you is your smile. AND It’s one less thing to worry about. After 3 months, make some effort to fit into most of your pre-pregnancy clothes – celebrate with each item that fits. Then take yourself shopping for some body hugging clothes and enjoy the compliments: ‘You don’t look like someone who JUST gave birth’.

• For the first 3 months, surrender to working around HIS schedule. Then gradually, with time, start working it to favour you more. Start reclaiming some parts of your pre-pregnancy life that made you happy. Keep at least one good friend who is not a mother, to remind you of YOU. You will soon meet a lot of friends who are parents.

• Remember to enjoy/ savour each moment, each day. As they say, ‘it goes by so quickly’. You really don’t want to be anywhere else… no, really.

"The joys of motherhood are never fully experienced until the children are in bed." ~ Author Unknown